Trina,
Excellent question and it is actually very easy to do and be unaware that you are doing it. You probably have great empathy for your clients and don't want them to be in pain. That is perfectly understandable and often comes with those of us drawn to healing professions.
May I suggest a couple of things I have learned over the years that might be helpful to you?
1. If my memories from past lives serve me correctly, a healing practice of taking on another's pain and transforming it through our own bodies was an advanced form of healing taught to some of us in previous lives. Because the practice is a part of our total memories, I believe some of us inadvertently do this without realizing it is an advanced practice and we should learn again in this life time how to do it competently. Our own energy body should be ready to do this.
2. Empathy can be quite powerful in healing, allowing our clients to know they have been truly seen, heard and understood at very deep levels. However, there is also a point at which our empathy can go so deep that we actually are taking away their power in our attempts to take away their pain. Here is the deal. Pain and suffering are present in our bodies because a part of us longs to gain spiritual mastery through our healing process. The pain is forcing us to pay attention enough to make significant changes in our thoughts, feelings and choices, and to access a greater flow of Divine realization through us. If someone tries to take away all of my pain, they are also taking away my power.
3. Instead of trying to take away pain, consider focusing on simply holding loving, compassionate awareness along with faith in the person's ability to heal themselves. In other words, as a healer, we get to support someone else in claiming their power. By holding space, we visualize, feel, hear and know them fully happy, free and healthy in their bodies. Holding this for another is a great gift because when we are in pain it can be difficult to hold that belief for yourself. But once a person senses they are in this safe container of holding, their own healing energies rise up to match the vision or space being held for them. It is a different kind of empathy because it does not attempt to take anything away. It sees the client as pure, beautiful and fully capable.
In summary, if you allow the flavor of your empathy to transform just a little bit so that you are compassionately holding space for their most healed self to emerge—voila—you will feel blessed and energized by the sacred container that you become. And any transference that sneaks through to you will be held in this same container, witnessed in your love. The witnessing itself, along with faith in absolute beauty of complete healing, will create an environment for ultimate transformation to occur.
Let me know if you use this approach and how it works for you!
Hugs,
Reverend Misa
